As a single mom, mother’s day tends to be a non-event. My kids are young and don’t really remember what the day is. I’m not going to bring it up. It’s no longer their father’s responsibility to remind them either.
It doesn’t bother me much, I don’t need to be celebrated. Spontaneous gifts like what I got the other day more than makes up for anything tangible that I could ever receive.
I follow A LOT of moms on Twitter and I see hundreds of tweets (and Facebook updates) from people talking about how great their spouses are when they get flowers or a brand new gadget or a trip to the spa. Occasionally, I get jealous and sentimental when I read those words.
I also feel selfish and I really don’t want to feel that way. I have two beautiful boys and my life is FINALLY going in the direction that I want it to go. I am finally living a life that honors who I truly am. BUT I am human and I can’t help but wish that someday I’d suddenly get that present (I don’t get birthday or Christmas presents either) that I’ve been dying to have. It’s those little moments that annoy me.
I don’t want to be that way! It’s just stuff and my life is better now than it ever was when I had a spouse who did gift me (regularly) with jewelry, gadgets or a carpet cleaner (one time it was a microwave, oy!).
So just for fun, I’m making a wish list. Maybe Donald Trump or Santa Claus will read this and surprise me. And someday when my kids are old enough to read my blog, I’ll send them this link and remind them that they have years of gifts to make up for!
1. An iPad – I really want one! I think it would be great to have when I’m chillin’ at the pool this summer, to take a few notes in my classes or waiting at the doctor’s office. There are so many apps that I think could help with my ADHD too. It would be good to carry around for so many reasons. I don’t even need a new one, a used first gen works for me!
2. A new laptop – This one is on it’s last leg. There’s no battery, the power cord falls out ALL. THE. TIME and I lose information. It’s broken from being dropped, my kids can’t type on it because they don’t know where the letters are since the paint is wearing off and it is starting to heat up rather quickly as of late. Above all else, my speakers are going out so there’s this horrendous whine coming from them that makes watching Netflix movies (our only entertainment splurge), The Vampire Diaries online and educational videos for school useless. I’m saving for one but I’m only about 25% of the way there. I’ll get there but if Santa wants to send me one now, I wouldn’t turn it away.
3. A new-to-me car – Ok this may be beyond Santa’s abilities BUT Donald Trump wouldn’t notice a few thousand to get me a decent vehicle. Marquis Mark isn’t sounding very good. I just put three quarts of oil in him after putting in 2 last month! And I now have 1 working window, broken AC and leather seats, this summer can be wrapped up in two words “HOT” and “STICKY.” Yuck! When it rains, my car gets wet…on the inside! The carpet is perpetually damp, sometimes even has a puddle. I just need something smaller, the gas consumption on a 1994 Mercury Grand Marquis is ridiculous!
4. A gift card to the mall – It sounds weird to say that but I need new clothes. I’ve lost over 25 pounds in the past couple of months and my clothes are starting to get really baggy. I’m hanging in there, luckily the summer is coming and I can survive with a few tank tops and exercise shorts. I don’t really go anywhere anyways BUT I do need some decent shorts. Even my feet lost weight. I have a pair of shoes that are super loose!
That’s it really, aside from some cash, health insurance and a full time job I can’t think of anything else I really want.
What shocks me about this list more than anything is that only 1 thing on there is really a want and that’s the iPad. I need a new computer if I expect to continue freelance writing, blogging and going to grad school. I will need a new-to-me vehicle soon and I’m kinda freaking out that I won’t have anything saved up for it when it does happen. And I will need new clothes very soon. I fully intend on losing another 50 pounds, none of my clothes will fit properly then, not even bras and underwear.
Maybe I am doing better than I thought with this whole growing up thing. My priorities have obviously changed, this list proves that. And if I never get to a point where I am debt free, at least I know I won’t ever go back to impulse purchases and uncontrolled spending.
Happy Mother’s Day to all you moms out there. Whether you are a single mom, a step-mom, a dad who functions as a mom or a any other variety of a mother, the work you do with and for your kids is more important than anything else you do in life! I’m proud to be a mom and I know you are proud to be one too!!
Original Photo Credit goes to jdhancock on Flickr (text added by me).
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